theme
Emily. 24. INFJ Put-A-Bird-On-it, Oregon. Funny. Sarcastic. Thoughtful. Overly excited. My life is stupid enough.
  • Totally Unserious

    What will it take to get you into this rhino anus today?

  • posted: 7 hours ago    with: 24,502 notes    (source / via)

    "I’ve become a master of napping anywhere." {x}

    ,same  
    posted: 8 hours ago    with: 1 note    (source / via)

    April Camp NaNoWriMo

    girlwriteswords:

    Day: 23

    30, 692/ 40, 000

    The ZSA walk into the garage. Lawrence pulls Elise away from the others. He’s holding a green folder in his hands. He puts the folder on the work bench. With a quick flick of his wrist the folder opens. The paper he’s pointing to is a map of Gwinn. A few places are circled with red ink. Lawrence is pointing to a specific circle. “What is this?”
    Elise slides the folder closer to her. She hunches over it. “The shipping yard.” She straightens herself out. “Why?”
    "They’re going to ship the zombies to other countries in structurally unsafe ships. Like the one the crashed on the coast. That’s what started the outbreak here." He closes the folder. "General Breck is orchestrating a new outbreak."
    Elise steps back. “Why would he do that?”
    "The president is dead. He’s trying to prove a point."
    Nick, Rhoda, and Dylan join them at the workbench. “The president is dead?” Nick asks holding Elise’s arms lightly.
    "Yes. That’s what the helicopters were. I saw her body. I saw her—"
    "They turned her?" Rhoda places her hand over her mouth as Lawrence nods. "Oh my God."
    Elise turns and buries her face in Nick’s chest. “They’ve blocked or bombed out every exit out of the city. We have no way out except by boat and that isn’t safe either. We have to stop them and we have to use their coms to get help to Gwinn and the other places that were hit.”
    "How are we going to stop them?" Nick asks holding Elise closer to him.
    "We have to work together. We can’t expect the other survivors to help this is all on us."
    "How do you expect us to be able to take them on?" Elise turns around. "We aren’t soldiers. We’re just people, dude!"

    (I feel like I’m losing the plot, so I’m trying to bring it back BUT IT’S SO HARD! WRITING IS HARD! WHY???!!! On the upside the end is in sight!)

    image

    ,
    posted: 9 hours ago    with: 5,325 notes    (source / via)

    swanjolras:

    HEY HEY HEY HEYYYYYYYY MY FAVORITE QUEER DRUNK ASSHOLE POET TURNED 450 TODAY (and let me tell you, there is a lot of competition for the title “favorite queer drunk asshole poet”)

    BUT as we all know, there is some controversy over who ACTUALLY wrote shakespeare’s plays!

    so in order to mark this SERIOUS and LEGITIMATE issue, i have compiled the most likely theories in this comprehensive list:

    • in julius caesar, cassius says, “this is my birthday; on this very day cassius was born.” on that same day, cassius DIES. guess who else was not only born on april 23, but died april 23?? that’s right, shakespeare. english playwright? or ancient roman ghost bent on revenge? YOU BE THE JUDGE.
    • shakespeare married a woman called anne hathaway. BATMAN ALSO MARRIED ANNE HATHAWAY. have you ever seen shakespeare and batman in the same place at the same time??????
    • lived in london? totally encountered prostitutes several times? probably spoke english? william shakespeare……. or JACK THE RIPPER
    • uh, excuse me, an uneducated glovemaker’s son couldn’t possibly have written the 38 works of art attributed to shakespeare. please consider instead this picture of a cat pushing another cat in a shopping cart. you’re welcome.
    • ””“”“”“”“”“president obama????”“”“”“”“” more like PRESIDENT WILLIAMSHAKESPOBAMA. wake UP, america
    • aliens.
    • ME I’M WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE I HAVE BEEN SHAKESPEARE ALL ALONG AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU FOOLS YOU IGNORANT FOOLS
    ,
    posted: 9 hours ago    with: 536 notes    (source / via)
    ,
    posted: 10 hours ago    with: 412 notes    (source / via)
    ,
    posted: 11 hours ago    with: 24,165 notes    (source / via)
    ,
    posted: 11 hours ago    with: 117,624 notes    (source / via)

    inabasket:

    cool it comes with a free refill 

    ,
    posted: 12 hours ago    with: 77,866 notes    (source / via)
    ,
    posted: 12 hours ago    with: 3,414 notes    (source / via)
    ,RT  
    posted: 12 hours ago    with: 88,097 notes    (source / via)
    simbaga:

foodnun:

namelessshameless:

swimminindaprivilege:

Among the stupider things I found while hunting for gifs.
Obviously when you’re not a Vanderbiltian silver fox, the sun just shifts it’s lighting all the time to make you look the exact same in all situations. It’s cosmic affirmative action!
This is a good post by one of the creators of Avatar: The Last Airbender on color theory, and how color can look completely different depending on surrounding colors and context. 

Uhh…that last image isn’t from the Aladdin film…It’s from a porn comic. It’s been cropped, in the full image he’s being blown by Hercules. 

tumblr loses again 

the fact that someone knew that image well enough to point it out is fucking killing me

    simbaga:

    foodnun:

    namelessshameless:

    swimminindaprivilege:

    Among the stupider things I found while hunting for gifs.

    Obviously when you’re not a Vanderbiltian silver fox, the sun just shifts it’s lighting all the time to make you look the exact same in all situations. It’s cosmic affirmative action!

    This is a good post by one of the creators of Avatar: The Last Airbender on color theory, and how color can look completely different depending on surrounding colors and context. 

    Uhh…that last image isn’t from the Aladdin film…It’s from a porn comic. It’s been cropped, in the full image he’s being blown by Hercules. 

    tumblr loses again 

    the fact that someone knew that image well enough to point it out is fucking killing me

    ,